The train ride!

There are times in your life when you want to try something different. As part of my adventure in Canada, I thought it would be a good idea to go for a train ride through the Rockies. My idea was that there would be lovely food, and an inspiring time in the observation lounge admiring the dramatic craggy rock formation and bright stars at night. A once in a life time trip.

I was a bit near the time getting my ticket, so I was to be in a recliner seat for the 20 hour journey. No bother I thought, it would be worth it for the experience. How hard could it be?

It all started off well. I was at the station early, I had a coffee and bought snacks. I got on the train at the end of a very long platform. I had some food, the staff were lovely, and I sat in the very quiet observation carriage and took a few photos of the snow covered landscape in the soft dwindling light.

It was dark, and I went back to my reclining seat. It was noisy in the carriage and a toddler was crying angrily. I had no WiFi. The night continued. The train kept stopping in the middle of nowhere for no apparent reason. It was still noisy and my book seemed a rather ambitious read. I tried to find a comfortable position, but I always seemed to be tangled up and sore, and at times I slid right off the seat. Sleep remained elusive. Closing my eyes was all i could manage. At 2am we had a stop, at what looked like a freight station and the conductor announced that we could get off to stretch out legs. I was not doing that- I might miss getting back on the train in the night and be wondering round thousands of freight containers for the rest of my life.

I am not going to lie, there were some weary and uncomfortable hours, when I thought why did I ever think this was a good idea?

And then after about 5am, I found a new rhythm. I decided to pray for friends, and family and the world. The woowoo of the train became comforting, the rocking motion reminded me of being held in a cradle. God transformed the things that were annoying me, and helped me come to terms with them.

I tell this story because often life follows this pattern. We are excited about doing something new. It goes well for a while, but then we hit a setback, and we are disorientated and discouraged. We question.

I think the thing that helps is that when we are doing something different or learning something new, it is good to remember that it is natural to have darker moments. Things are seldom exactly as we hope. But in these moments, we are not to give up, but to ask God to help us adapt, to find new insight, to refocus on the good.

Eventually on my train ride the morning light came. My eyes still felt as if they were on match sticks, and I was still exhausted. But I had a coffee, my energy returned, and I had a sense of achievement. I had survived a 20 hour train ride in the Rockies, and it had been good. At the end of it all, I saw new unimaginable things and arrived in a new place. It was all worthwhile.

Gracious God, at times we can be in danger of being stuck in a rut and so we try new things. We start off full of enthusiasm, bright eyed and bushy tailed. But then things are different from how we anticipate, we get tired and it is tempting to despair. Lord Jesus, thankyou that when we look to You, that You can transform our situation. Holy Spirit remind us of all that is good, help us to see the funny side of things, to accept setbacks, and to pray they might only be temporary. Keep all those who travel safe this day, and may the kindness of strangers always surprise. May setbacks never deter us from trying something new, and may we have courage to be pioneers even when it can feel daunting. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Deep calls to deep…

I have been so privileged to be able to travel recently. Travel reminds me there is a big beautiful world out there, and helps give me a sense of perspective. I have met so many fascinating people along the way, people who share their stories and something of themselves.

At the weekend I went to Niagara falls, and I stood for ages just mesmerised by the powerful and noisy rush of water cascading over the edge of the precipice. It was so loud, and carried such force with it. And when you looked at the water, it was a myriad of colours blue, turquoise, green, grey, white. I felt almost hypnotised by the scale and majesty of it all- it felt quite ethereal.

It reminded me of the psalmist, in Psalm 42 verse 7 where the psalmist says ‘ Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls, all your waves and breakers have sweet over me.’

The psalmist is lamenting, remembering a better past, and his soul is longing for God like a deer longing for water. And beside this waterfall, he experiences the presence of God, and he chooses to put his hope in God once more, and to praise Him once more.

May we all have waterfall experiences, where that deep connection with God is restored. It cannot always be put into words, but it is like the love and mercy of God cascading over us, cleansing and refreshing and reviving our soul. And that is the very thing we need the most.

Gracious God, our lives can be out of kilter, alienated from ourselves and from others, and we cry to You for help. Thankyou that You hear our cry of longing and pleading even from the darkest place We lament over the things that are lost, and listen for your response. And in the sound of the waterfall, powerful and melodic, we hear Your voice. In Christ Jesus, You restore us to Yourself, bringing that deep reconciliation and integration that we need. In your presence, the Holy Spirit recreate us in the image of God, so we are free to be our true selves, loved, purposeful and at peace. And when we get stuck again, which we always will, may Your love reconnect us, and bless and replenish our souls. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Brilliant frosting and silver swirls!

I know I need to have an ethical problem with flying because of global warming. I believe that we shouldn’t fly when we don’t need to, and we need to offset emissions.

Yet here I am going on holiday on a plane. I have a window seat, which doesn’t happen very often. I love looking out at the bright white dramatic cloud landscapes of mountains and precipices. You can imagine a whole world of characters and stories playing out in this pristine world.

Often the view out a window is just of non- descript clouds, a relentless, monotonous grey. And then another few hundred miles on there is a break in the clouds and you can just catch a glimpse of the seahorses playing in the sea below. On this trip, I think somewhere over Greenland, I saw some amazingly beautifully swirly ice formations! They were so stunning in form, just perfect. And I had a immense sense of awe at the vastness and brilliance of creation. Nobody else might have witnessed it (apart from the others on the flight). But it was perfect.

It is strangely reassuring that God creates such amazing vistas- whether ice mountains, or Brazilian forests or coral reefs and ecosystems in the ocean, even when no one might ever witness their exquisite beauty. It is a reminder that things matter, even when they are not seen. Now and again we stumble into an unexpected place, and catch a glimpse of glory, and we realise that we stand in the presence of God. No more words are required, for we just marvel.

In the book of Job chapter 38, God asks Job if he understands Him- if he has knowledge of the storehouses of snow, of the origin of lightning bolts and the constellations in the sky, which all point to the creativity and splendour of God. In response, Job humbles himself, and his faith is rekindled.

Eternal Father, like Job, we are so privileged to glimpse eternal vistas of eternity, and to realise the staggering gorgeous nature of the universe that speaks of Your glory, and to recognise our own finite nature anew. Lord Jesus- in You we see the very nature of God, for You speak the Words of eternal life, of love and strength and forgiveness and courage. May Your words encourage us never to give up, and for our wills to always be aligned with your will. Holy Spirit, thankyou for the reminder that what is unseen is eternal- whether the stars on an inky winter’s night, or acts of kindness and mercy. May we be reminded that nothing spiritual is wasted, even when it is unseen, and so may our lives also always bring glory to You.

There is always a place for you at the table….

One of the many things I love about Jesus was how often he chose to spend time with people, at a wedding, talking to people on hills in Galilee or the streets of Jerusalem. He engaged with everyone, teaching, challenging and bringing healing. He often asked questions and made people think. He wanted to bring the ways of heaven to earth. He went to the home of the tax collectors, spoke with the prostitute and those who were sick. He had time for everyone.

Our society is fragmented just now. Many people are lonely and scared, wondering who they are and what their purpose it. Since covid, we all seem to have grown further apart, alienated from one another. We got used to being alone.

Jesus often ate with people, with his disciples, friends and anyone around. He treated each person with dignity and respect. He welcomed people and showed them love.

If you are feeling a bit low today, or missing a loved one, or just out of sorts, please know how much you are loved. I believe that Jesus welcomed everyone, from the smallest child to the woman with a difficult story. He sees us, He welcomes us to the table and says ‘ there is a place for you.’. We are seen, cherished, loved.

It is hard to find our way in the world just now. Too many people wrestle with self doubt, with dark memories, with pride or shame or guilt. We wonder what is our life about. May we place our trust in our God who loves us. Even if we have faith just the size of a grain of mustard, that is enough. May we each know the welcome and grace of our God.

In Luke 14: 12-24- Jesus spoke of a banquet, where the people to be invited were the poor, the crippled, the lame and the blind. The idea was that no one was to be missed out, and everyone welcomed. May we take this to heart, and also seek to show hospitality to others, in the same way as God welcomes us.

Gracious God, there are times in our lives when we can feel cut off from others, questioning our worth, feeling invisible. Thankyou Lord Jesus, that You always see us, and make a space for us at your table. We come not on merit, but because of your grace. We are humbled and deeply grateful that You see and welcome us even when we do not deserve it. Holy Spirit help us to realise the meaning of your grace deep in our souls, and to know we always have somewhere we belong with You. Thankyou Lord.

Hope in the storm.

Storm Eowyn is all around us just now- there are violent squalls, dancing trees and thunderous waves crashing on our shorelines. The noise of the winds overnight have kept people awake, and hopefully as many people as possible are inside. We pray for people to keep safe, and think of people who have to work, the homeless and the vulnerable who are at risk.

I feel so fortunate as I am warm and dry- I am in a place of shelter, and I am reminded of Elijah who took refuge from his life in a cave on Mount Horeb. He was exhausted and fed up and questioning. In 1 Kings 19 we hear of his story. In a dark moment in his life an angel appears beside him, and gives him food and drink, and then leads him to this cave- a journey of 40 days and nights.

Whilst Elijah is in the cave- he is told that the Lord is about to pass by, and there is a powerful wind and storm. Elijah waits for a message from God, but it comes not from the wind, or earthquake or fire, but in a gentle whisper. And God’s message to him gives him a new way forward and people around him to help. And he is reminded that he is not alone.

We all have our time of being in the cave- a place of darkness and exhaustion, but it can also be a place where we surrender our pride or any illusion that we can fix things by ourselves. In a safe place just with God, we can be completely honest about our failures, our struggles, our doubts, our worries, our woundedness. It is a place where we can open our hearts.

For Elijah, he felt as if he had failed and that his life was worthless. Yet God had mercy on him, sends an angel to tender to him, gives him time to physically recover, and then speaks to him words of encouragement. In that safe spiritual place where we speak with and listen to God, I believe that He has a message of love and grace for us, and message of restoration and hope. We just need to find our safe place, and pray for the Holy Spirit to speak to us, so we can find new strength and healing.

Eternal Father, we thankyou that You see us, and that You look upon us with love. Sometimes we feel like Elijah, worn down or disillusioned with life, and we cry out to You. Thankyou that You send angels to minister to us, that You care for our physical needs, and then speak to our souls in the most unexpected of ways, even a still small voice. Lord Jesus, in your earthly life, You took time away from people just to be with your Father, and to enjoy His presence. May we too, at the prompting of your Holy Spirit, take that time, to hear your Word in season, to know your healing, and to rediscover hope, even in the midst of the storm, for Jesus sake, Amen.

Soaring worship!

Today I was thankful to venture out into a snow covered landscape up at Glencoe. The scenery was crisp and breathtaking, with snow that glinted with gold in the sunshine, swirling clouds and deep blue skies. There was an enormous sense of space and freedom in the landscape.

Sometimes we can rush past beautiful scenery, with it just forming a backdrop to our lives. However it is good to deliberately take time, to stop and stand and stare, as the poet W H Davies said. When we are attentive to the often gorgeous nature of our enviroment, it can make all the difference- whether noticing the bright stars in the inky night sky, or the violet and crimson colour of the dawn.

In the Bible, mountains often symbolise strength and inspiration. People were seen as closer to God on a mountaintop. Moses received the ten commandments on Mount Sinai. Jesus would retreat to a quiet place in the hills to pray and commune with His heavenly Father. Being in a place of space and beauty helped people be aware of the presence of God.

In psalm 90 verse 2 it says, ” Before the mountains were born, before You brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting, You are God’. There is something about the character of a mountainous landscape that inspires awe, and humility and worship. There is a feeling of wonder and purity of worship, of being in the very throne room of God. Pausing, and allowing that sense to deepen and envelop us, enables our worship to soar, and for us to feel closer to God.

As we go further into this new year, may we be attentive to the landscape around us, to notice God’s hand at work, and to allow ourselves to be more thankful and inspired. May the Holy Spirit quieten our soul, so we can discern the hand of God and reverently praise our eternal God.

Eternal Father, You have created the wonders of this world to tell forth Your truth and glory. Lord Jesus, forgive us that we often hurry mindlessly from one activity to another, forgetting to pause and look up, to take time to reflect and pray. From everlasting to everlasting You are God- as we hear these words we bow down before You. Through your Holy Spirit, purify our souls, our very lives, and in our worship may we rededicate our lives to You with reverence and praise, now and for all eternity, Amen.

Trying less hard and trusting more!

Trying to do things in our own strength!

Sometimes when things are difficult, what you think is- I need to try harder. If I can figure out a different approach, or if I study more, or if I work more hours, or pray longer, maybe everything will get better. It all can seem very reasonable as a plan.

However trying harder is not always the answer. Sometimes we can fixate on different options or ideas, but actually they are not going to change things. Sometimes the situation is not going to improve, or change for the better, and working harder just masks the reality of the underlying issues.

At times in my life, I have gone for the trying harder option. I have wanted to fix things, make them better, even when it has been costly. That has seemed a very Christian thing to do- to take up your cross, to persevere, to find a way forward.

However in my older age, I have realised that I need to stop and question things long before that stage, because I need to ask for wisdom to see things clearly, to have discernment. Often when you are involved in a situation, you don’t have any objectivity- instead you have memories, emotions and perceptions, but you are so intertwined in them all, that you just think you should try to figure it out.

However sometimes God calls us to pause, to seek Him in prayer, to reflect with a trustworthy person, and to ask for guidance. There are times when persevering is no longer the right path, and God says to us to let it all go, and sends us in a new direction. This can be a wake up call, but can be healthier for everyone involved.

The verse in Proverbs 3: 5 and 6 makes it sound so easy; ‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight ” When we try to work harder to make a situation better, although we can be well motivated, at times we are not seeing things through God’s eyes. Maybe we have played our part, and now it is some one else’s turn to do the next bit. That is not failure- it can be wisdom.

The turn of the year provides a space to reflect. We look at our lives, and ask God to show us our path, what to let go of, and what to embrace. To see your situation with greater detachment, can enable a discernment- what is our path to be, what brings us closer to God, in what ways can we bless others and also grow in our own faith. Some potential decisions would be disastrous, so we ask for strength to avoid these. Others might need some exploration as they are ambiguous. In all things we listen to the Holy Spirit, and trust that God will reveal more of His purpose to us.

In this new year, for me I know I need to try less hard, but listen more deeply for God’s voice. Being on the right path can help me find a deeper peace, and a better way to live.

Gracious God, we often try so hard to make the world better, by working long hours, by getting more knowledge, by making excuses for bad behaviours. Lord Jesus, You came to bring us forgiveness for our sins, and then to set us free. Forgive us when we try too hard to make things better, when we are working in our own strength. Set us free from false expectations, show us how to make wise decisions, and to live more fully in Your love. May we all learn to walk in the light, to listen for your Holy Spirit, and to trust You for the next step in the path, so we can find peace, in Jesus’ name, Amen.

Tears on the journey?

In this Christmas season, we reflect on all the characters in the gospel narratives, and I often think about Mary especially. When the angel Gabriel came to tell her of the child who would be God’s son, although she did not understand it, she was willing to be obedient. Mary seems to have such a sweet and humble disposition, with a desire to say yes to God.

Yet as she and Joseph travelled from Nazareth to Bethlehem, a journey thst would have taken four days on foot, you wonder what emotions she might gave experienced. To be 9 months pregnant and to walk eight hours a day must have been so hard. Mary is often portrayed as being on a donkey, but there is no mention of a donkey in the details shared in the gospels. If she travelled on foot, perhaps at night when it was cooler, she must gave been very tired, her body sore, and maybe even anxious and questioning. Who was going to support her when the baby came? How was she going to cope, so far away from most of her family? Maybe she was even afraid or tearful, wondering why things were unfolding the way they were.

It speaks so much to our human condition, that we often trust God, but struggle with human doubts and fears. The ‘what if’s’ can unsettled us, when our minds worry about the worst case scenarios. We can end up paralysed and tearful, wondering how it will all end up.

Mary must have had her struggles, yet somehow she still trusted in God’s goodness and love. Whatever situation we find ourselves in today, I think we too are called to trust, and to trust so deeply, that our trust is bigger than our fears.

The famous verses from Proverbs 3: 5-6 say; ‘ Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your path straight.’ Trusting like this is not just in a one off moment, but a continued reliance on a God who is faithful and loving, and who seeks to guide our path even through unexpected twists and turns, and even in the dark. May we set aside our fears and anxieties, and learn to trust more fully.

Eternal God, we are inspired by Mary’s example and obedience to You, to travel with Joseph to Bethlehem even when it was tough and uncomfortable. Lord Jesus, You call us to follow you, even when it is dark, and we don’t know where we are going. Holy Spirit, forgive us when we are scared or tearful, and help us to trust You, knowing that You are faithful and will never let us down. For Mary, her humble trust led to the birth of the Saviour of the world. Through our obedience, may You also birth a new beginning in us that brings hope and light and life, Amen

Aslan is coming!

It has been so very cold in Scotland this week, with deep frosts overnight. It has been a beautiful season to walk in, with clear skies, crunchy leaves under foot, and fir trees painted with white patterns of sparkle!

It reminded me a bit of Narnia! I love reading C S Lewis’s Narnia books- they have such rich symbolism and imagery. You might remember it all starts with the four children Peter, Susan, Edmund and Lucy. Through the wardrobe, they inadvertently enter the into the magical land of Narnia, where the white witch seems to be in charge, and the land is always cold and wintry. It is a hostile landscape to live in.

However when Aslan is abroad, the snow starts to melt, the greenery starts to re- emerge, and life begins to return to the land. Aslan is the lion, whose presence is memorable- he is described as not safe but good. He symbolises God, not able to be fully known, but always worthy of our trust.

When I was travelling this week, there was a glorious moment when the sun broke through the clouds, the mist was dispersed, and the frost started to melt, and the green grass started to emerge. And hope reignited in my heart- it felt like a reminder of God being at work in our land. I tried to capture something of this in the photo above.

There is a poignant moment in the book ‘ The Dawn Treader’ where Lucy is in distress and says ‘ Aslan, Aslan, if you ever loved us at all, send us help now.’ The darkness did not seem any less, but she felt a little, a very little, less afraid.’ And later she hears a voice saying ‘ Courage dear heart’ and she knows her prayer has been heard.

As we go further into Advent, may we remember that Aslan is still about, and that God hears our prayers, and may this bring us hope.

Eternal Father, we give you thanks for Christian authors and artists who are so creative in conveying Your beauty and mystery and goodness. We give thanks for Aslan, the lion who sacrifices himself for the good of all. As we go further into Advent, we give thanks that we celebrate that Love came down at Christmas, in the form of our Saviour Jesus Christ. When are hearts have grown wintry, may Your presence melt away any barriers to receiving your love, so we can be tender and forgiving. Holy Spirit breathe into us colour and life once more, so we can reflect something of your light and love, even in winter months. Give us courage and hope we pray, and a trust that You hear our prayers, Amen.

A little child shall lead them……..

Advent can be an amazing time of the year, a time of reflection and quiet moments and hope. Yet in practice it can be busy, noisy and stressful, and the strident cacophony can drown out the more contemplative aspects.

I was listening to a friend speak of the pressures and commercialise of this season, and then our conversation touched on the joy of children at this time of year. Their appreciation of fun, of being together, and of knowing that the season is because of its the birthday of Jesus can be breathtaking. Even being the donkey in the nativity can bring much excitement!

Maybe we need to learn from that wonder and excitement of small children. As adults we are sometimes too cynical- we have lived through this season a few times before, after all. Preparing to celebrate Jesus’ birth, taking a few moments each day thinking of the words of the prophets, allowing ourselves to be moved again by the incredible blessing of the Son of God being born on earth, is stunning.

Words from Isaiah 9:2 remind us of the glory and mystery of it all- such powerful words of prophecy about the One who is to come: He will be called ‘ Wonderful Counsellor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of peace.’

Another prophetic verse that is so poignant is an image from Isaiah 11:6 of a day when ‘the wolf will live with the lamb, the leopard will lie down with the goat, the calf and the lion and the yearling together, and a little child will lead them….’

It speaks of harmony between animals and people, and the choosing of a little child leading them seems so apt. It is not just the vulnerability of the child that is significant, but that attitude of trust and innocence.

In this time of Advent, may we all rediscover the trust and wonder of small children in our own hearts. May we take time out of the clamour and noise, to be reminded of the wonder and beauty of the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ, and marvel at His coming.

Eternal God, forgive us that we get so caught up in the pressures and superficial nature of the season, when we feel jaded and exhausted. Help us to find time to stop, to be present, and to wonder and worship at the side of the manger, with the trust and awe of a small child. Holy Spirit, rekindle our love for our Saviour, our reverence at His goodness and majesty, so that we may experience a purity of heart, that overflows with thanksgiving. Speak to us that Word we need to hear in this season, Amen.