Watching paint dry!

You often hear people say that something was like ‘watching paint dry’. That usually means it was not very exciting.

In the last week however, I have discovered that watching paint dry is a very compelling activity. I have been painting black walls, and try to make them light colours. Little did I know it would take six coats of paint, and still not be quite right. And one of my learnings has been that a wall can look not bad, till you give it another coat, at which point the wet paint makes it look more streaky than ever. And then every 10 minutes, as you watch it dry, it changes, until 4 hours later it stabilises, and you can decide whether to do the whole process all over again.

Other thing I have learned, do not drip paint in a trail across the floor, as it takes so long to get off. There is a myth that if you put extra paint on your brush, things might be expedited more quickly, but only if all the drops don’t fall on your head. A particular favourite is do not stand on wall paper paste, as then your shoes start sticking to the floor! Remember also to change your painty clothes before you go out, as you look like you have a badly co ordinated multicoloured coat. I do love it though when people look at you and say ‘have you been painting?’.People’s insight knows no limits!

During this process, I have learned a lot about myself. I am so impatient- I so want the paint to dry. I am an optimist- this tme it will look better. I would also rather do these things myself- who wants to share their painting mishaps with other people?

I believe God wants to teach us through all we go through in life. For me, He is teaching me to be more patient, to be a little more realistic, to sometimes invite others to share in small disasters. And to be a bit more cateful when I am painting!

I love the information in Ezekiel chapters 31-4, about all the master craftsmen and artists who worked in metal, wood and jewels to make the ark, furnishings and priestly garments beautiful for God and for a place of worship. There is such care in doing this, and we are told that Bezalel and the others were guided by the Holy Spirit. There is a sense of reverence in making things that are fit for a God of holiness and love.

When we are being creative, in painting, woodwork, or craftsmanship of any kind, we are to dedicate what we are doing to God. We don’t always get to contribute to decorating a place of worship, sometimes it is just our home, but we still want to make our enviroment as cosy and hospitable as we can, with meaningful photos, pictures and colour.

Even watching paint dry, can be part of that process of creativity and design!

Creator God, You created the heavens and the earth, with such a rich variety of shape and form and colour, and formed all creatures, and even human beings made in your image. We are amazed at the ethereal worksmanship of Your hand, the vivid imagination shown in the complexity of all things, from a ladybird to a leopard. Lord Jesus, the Carpenter from Nazareth, may we take every opportinity to design and create exquisite enviroments that reflect your glory, and may your Holy Spirit help us to be innovative in sharing Your love with others in a myriad of ways. May our churches and our homes be places that speak of Your love and reflect your splendour. In Jesus, name, Amen

Under the weather…

Every now and again I get a cold. In the universal scheme of things, it is such a small thing. However it can be debilitating. Having a sore throat, sneezing, coughing and not sleeping is annoying when you are trying to live and get things done. Taking time to rest and heal can be hard.

There are so many things that can throw us off balance, a cold, toothache, indigestion or an insect bite. We know it is just a temporary inconvenience, but it can be so frustrating!

Rather than complaining to the whole world, just small steps in the right direction can help. Taking time out to get the right treatment can be key. Instead of procrastinating, and putting other things first, we take time to make that appointment, and to prioritise our wellbeing. Sometimes we put a medical appointment off hecause we are worried about something, but that makes it especially important to go.

Once we have a diagnosis, and maybe medication, that can help. Then we have to rest. That can mean taking time off work, or trying to get some one else to do the school run. If we feel well enough to do stuff, that’s great. But if we don’t, then asking some one for help can be ok.

If we are not feeling well, then asking for support can be crucial. We don’t always like to admit our vulnerabilities, yet people are often more kind and understandibg than we anticipate. Having some one who makes us tea or brings us soup can be just what is needed. And then when others are unwell, then we have the opportunity to bless them in return.

When we are unwell, or worried about tests coming back, another thing we can do is to ask for prayer. In his life on earth, Jesus often prayed for the sick- the paralysed man (Mark 2:1-12), the woman who was crippled (Luke 13: 10-17), or the person with leprosy (Matthew 8: 1-4). And there was healing of some kind, the person recovered physically, or found comfort and peace. There are so many beautiful examples in all four gospels, which are so worth exploring.

We don’t always understand why prayers are answered in different ways, but to ask for the healing love and light of Jesus to bless a person is always a good thing. And when we feel unwell, we often don’t have the concentration to pray much ourselves. So the gift of prayer is a beautiful way of showing care to others.

When we are less well, we seek medical care and medication, holistic care and encouragement, and the blessing of the nearness of God. We often struggle along by ourselves, but when we seek to bless and care for one another, this helps us to feel seen, to know we are loved, and for us to get better! May we resolve to be a more authentic healing community, courageous enough to ask for help, resolute enough to rest, and always willing to pray for and to be supportive of others.

Gracious God, You are the God of light and grace, the One who loves to bless and heal. As people, we are so broken, struggling with illnesses, big and small, sometimes worn out, at times losing hope. Lord Jesus, you noticed the hurting and the sick, the disillusioned and the rejected, and You stretched out your hand to bless and to heal. Thank you that you understand our struggles, and hear our prayers . Send your holy spirit upon us to bring healing and peace. Bless all those who work in medical settings, and may they have the wisdom, resources and insight they need to always provide the best of care. And as a community, may we always show kindness and patience to all we meet, especially whose who are suffering. In Jesus’ name, Amen

Noticing subtle colours

In recent days, I was privileged to spend time up in the Arctic circle. It was during the 46 days of polar darkness, meaning that the sun did not cross the horizon in these days because the land is so far north. There were some twilight hours however, between 8.30am and 2pm. One of these times was called the blue hour, when the sky and the sea took the hue of deep indigo, contrasting sharply with the white snow coloured landscape- it was a mesmerising time of day, the blue hour was in the morning and in the evening- times of transition.

In the middle period, when snow was not imminent, there were periods of subtle and sublime colours in the sky and reflected on the waters. They were constantly changing, a dozen shades of ethereal pastels- yellow, violet, pink, orange, grey, azure and so many others, shimmering on the horizon. They appeared delicate and fragile, and kept changing in a synchronicty of dance.

Trying to find the words to describe these shades of colours falling on infinite snowy mountains, fjords and numerous islands is beyond language. And it reminded me of the subtlety and nuance of human existence. At its best, nuance is expressed in poetry and theatre, sublety in art and music and literature. It is part of our humanity.

In this often strident and harsh world, where opinions are polarised, and so many fight for survival by stereotyping and demonising their enemy, we need to remember the power and goodness of subtlety and stillness, of quiet prayer and civil discourse. Times of reflection and quietness, help us listen more deeply, to one another, and to God.

Karl Barth famously said ‘ to clasp the hands in prayer is the beginning of an uprising against the disorder of the world.’

We may be quiet in demeanor, but we are not to succumb to hatred and derision. We follow the way of Jesus, calling out what is corrupt or hypocritical with fairness and a concern for the wellbeing of all. We are called to do this, but with the gentleness of a dove, and the wisdom of a serpent. Let us not give up when the rhetoric of bullies is loud and brash, and let us not take up their tactics, however we might be tempted. We follow a Saviour who has already won the victory for the all surpassing transformative power of love, goodness and forgivenes. In society people always disagree, but may we do so with dignity and respect. In every circumstance, may we follow Jesus’ example faithfully, and be empowered by your Holy spirit, to pray and work for a more harmonious and just society.

Gracious God, You are just and loving and kind, You made this earth and her peoples, to live in harmony and peace. Yet we rebel and look after ourselves at the expence of others, we speak with anger and frustration complaining about and shouting at those who think differently. Forgive us for our pride and arrogance.

Lord Jesus forgive our cries of indignation at our own circumstances, and refocus our hearts that we might hear the cry of the poor, the marginalised, the wounded and the despairing. Take away our complacency, soften our hard hearts. May we follow the ways of love to speak with moderation and a quiet wisdom that comes from your spirit, on behalf of the suffering and dispossesed. Let us not become weary but remember that there can be strength in quietness, and wisdom and beauty in regulation and subtlety. Guide us as to how best to pray, and to be salt and light in these days of discord, that we might humbly but clearly be bearers of Your light, Amen

Gentler self talk!

The wintry weather recently has been challenging, but beautiful. Just seeing the snow falling softly on the trees is gorgeous. There’s a quiet hush in the air after a snow fall- all the sound is absorbed, and the world seems still.

I have been reflecting at the beginning of this new year, as to what I should be doing with my life. I ask God to show me, and I am grateful that He has a path and a purpose for me even though I don’t always know exactly what it looks like. I trust God, as I believe He is good, loving, kind and true.

When sitting in God’s presence, what I notice is that He is more loving to me than I am to myself. Sometimes I am so frustrated with all my failings- I want to do better, to be more discerning, to be more effective, more energetic.

And so in this new year, I want to be gentler in how I deal with my failings. We live in such a harsh world just now, pressurised, polarised, full of strident voices. It is easy to be influenced by this, and to also adopt that harsh tone with ourselves and others.

Yet I go back to the words of Jesus in Matthew 11, where He gives that invitation about coming to Him and finding rest. In verse 29 he says: ‘take my yoke upon you, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.’

In the past, I was so rest orientated, that I didn’t notice Jesus saying He is gentle and humble in heart. In another part of Matthew’s gospel, chapter 12:20 it says ‘ a bruised reed He will not break, and a smouldering wick he will not snuff out.’

We are reminded that Jesus deals gently and tenderly with the damaged and the broken, that He sees our hurts and heartache, and ministers to us with humility and kindness.

Jesus has an inner strength, a love and goodness thst reflects the nature of God Himself, yet He sees the value of the small and the wounded, and has a special place for them. He deals with us gently when we are sad or struggling, snd shows us compassion.

We need to learn from Jesus, and be more compassionate to ourselves, to be thankful for the good, to notice the difficult stuff, to ask God to help us to be stronger, or more careful, or more patient, or whatever gift we seek. He knows our needs, and shows us such grace and care. May we love ourselves, as He loves us, and be gentler in our expectations. May we pray.

Father God, sometimes we make the same mistakes over and over again, and we feel that we are trapped in a cycle of despair. In the midst of our frustation with our own limitations, Lord Jesus you look upon us with tenderness, for You are gentle and humble in heart. Under your gaze, we feel seen and loved, we forgive ourselves, and find new patience to accept our failings. We still pray for your Holy Spirit to guide us, and minister to us, but we are patient as we wait, and trust that You are doing a good thing. Thank you Lord, that we can rest, Amen.

Advent tears.

Advent- a time of preparation- not just preparing for Christmas, but for the coming of Jesus Christ, the baby of Bethlehem, the Saviour of the world. It can be a time of people coming together, of food preparation, of carol services and prayer. We enjoy Christmas hymns in candle light, nativity services and the Word being proclaimed. Worship is sacred and meaningful.

Something I have noticed however, is that sometimes in worship we are told to be joyful. I understand that joy is a gift from God, and that there is so much to give thanks for. However people can be going through difficult days, when joy can be elusive. People can have health concerns, be experiencing family heartbreak, or the recent loss of a loved one. It can feel that everyone else is doing ok, but that you are not.

It seems so important to give people space to be real. Christmas can be a poignant time, with people travelling long journeys, under pressure to buy things they can’t afford, isolated from loved ones, remembering those no longer here, haunted by memories from the past.

We often sanitise the Christmas story, remembering only angels, shepherds and wise men. We forget the incredulity of Joseph, the stress for Mary, that long uncomfortable journey to Bethelehem, and the uncertainty of what was going to happen next. Having a baby round the back of the inn must have been a frightening experience for a young girl. Placing a new born baby in a manger, gives a small insight as to the impracticalities of the whole thing -the Messiah, being born on earth in the most humble and unlikely of circumstances.

In Matthew’s gospel, chapter 1 verse 22 it says ‘all this took place to fulfil what the Lord said through the prophet ‘ the virgin shall be with child, and will give birth to a Son, and they will call him Emmanuel, which means ‘God with us.’

We are so thankful for the presence of Jesus with us in all circumstances. As we come nearer to Christmas, we may well feel joy that we can celebrate Christ’s coming. But for those whose hearts are heavy through pain, worry or grief, may we acknowledge this, and sit with them without pressure or expectation. And may each person know that their story is known by God, that they are seen and not forgotten, and that they are treasured and loved.

Eternal God, You are our Creator, and we are so thankful at our Saviour coming to earth in the form of a human baby, vulnerable and small. Lord Jesus we are thankful that you are our Emmanuel, the God who is with us. We marvel at your grace to us, when we so little deserve it. We want to worship You, and to celebrate your birth. Sometimes however, our hearts are sore, and we worship through our tears. In our communities, help us to accept each other, in the same way that You welcome us, just as we are. Holy spirit, whatever our circumstances this Christmas, may our lives be touched by You, and may we experience, comfort, love and hope. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

The blessing of libraries!

In the last few weeks, I had the joy of entering into a new library. It was so wonderful, full of amazing books, inviting desks, digital catalogues and periodicals and journals. It even had a coffee shop attached…..

One of my first part time jobs was in a library. I loved sorting the books in the Dewey Decimal system, and trying to answer customer queries. You never knew what was going to happen next, and you were always learning.

There are so many quotations about the power of reading. We might think of Dr Seuss ‘ the more you read, the more you learn. The more you learn, the more places you will go.’ Or the quotation by Gail Carson Levine ‘ a library is infinity under a roof’. There are so many possibilities to learn new things about the planet, to get lost in an imaginative fictional world, to be challenged by the most exquisite wordsmanship in poetry and prose. It is being able to connect with the ideas and insights of millions of people around the planet on every conceivable topic. It is an open door to experiencing some of the most inspirational and uplifting of thoughts.

I love libraries because they offer opportunities to listen to some of the most inspiring people. However I choose not to read things which are cruel or offensive. I read things from different viewpoints, because I need to be challenged, and my mind enlarged. Yet I seek discernment as to what will build me up, rather than pull me down.

As a Christian, I do love reading the bible. I so appreciate the honesty of the psalms, the wisdom that different characters learn, the gospel accounts of Jesus’ life, the letters written by leaders in the early church. Some parts are harder to understand- and lead to questions as to why something was included, what an action meant in the culture of the day, how to interpret meaning. I pray for the holy spirit to help me, every time I open its pages. The words from psalm 119, verse 105 help:

‘Your word is a lamp to my feet, and a light for my path.’

The bible is a library of books in itself, and I pray for God to help me to approach its pages with humility, and a desire to learn more of His Love.

Having so many amazing books to read is such a gift. Having so many translations of the bible, and to have them so freely available is also something never to be taken for granted. May we use our libraries well, to keep them open. And may we take every opportunity to learn, and to grow in our appreciation of the world, and in our spiritual journey.

Gracious God, You spoke, and the heavens and the earth came into being. We thankyou for the power of words, and ask that they might be used not to diminish and destroy, but to bless and to heal. Lord Jesus- Your teaching brings wisdom and truth. Help us to not just hear, but to live out Your truth. Holy spirit, we give thanks for the wonder and beauty of life, in all its complexity and depth- in the midst of it all, may we always be open to learning- guide us to live well, and to love wisely. In Jesus’ name, Amen

Intersections of trauma and grace…

The world feels so broken just now- so many suffering in conflict zones, refugee camps, and situations of bullying and abuse, poverty and disaster. These are many questions as to how we can work for justice and also respect the dignity and value of every human being.

I have been thinking of that brokeness, partly through the lens of trauma. Gabor Mate defines trauma as a soul wound, as ‘an inner injury, a lasting rupture or split within the self due to difficult or hurtful events’ and also ‘what happens inside you because of what happened to you.’ The Myth of Normal p20. So many people feel hurting and disconnected after experiencing distressing and terrifying events.

So many of the descriptions of Jesus in the gospels are about healing- touching the leper, listening to the outsider, bringing sight to the blind man. His ministry was often seen amongst the people on the road, whether noticing the man in the tree, or the child who was unwell, or the woman in pain. His tender gaze and wise questions, enabled people to find peace and healing.

In this world of suffering and injustice, and taking into account our own brokeness and shortcomings, how can we show the love of Christ? It is partly through prayer, friendship, hospitality and advocacy for those who are marginalised. I think it is also though using a trauma informed lens, so we can use psychological and neurological insights too. There is so much overlap between Christian principles and practices, and being trauma informed and holistic. Humans need physical healing, trauma therapy, but spiritual support and guidance also.

As Christians we are called to show the love of Christ to all people. Recently I have discerned a call to do some research into the impact of trauma and moral injury in the veteran community. Moral injury can be defined in different ways, but in essence is a distress caused when a person has been involved in something which has violated their conscience or ethical framework, and has caused questioning, shame and guilt.

I feel called to this particular area, because of lived family experience. It feels like a way of seeking to embody Jesus’ love for this part of our society, and many people are working in similar issues in other groups, so hopefully we can all learn from each other. It means taking some time out of parish ministry to do it justice, but I feel this is my priority for just now. I want to listen to the stories of veterans and their families in Scotland and in the USA, and if you have a story to share, or know someone who does, please get in touch- woundedwarriorfg@gmail.com

Some verses that have always resonated with me are from 2 Corinthians 5, especially verses 17 to 19 ‘if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation, the old has gone, and the new has come. All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ, and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting our sins against us. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation……’

For me, healing is holistic, and comprises of showing love and forgiveness, and pursuing advocacy and justice. Yes, we want to listen, and see healing in body, mind and soul, but alongside that we are called to be a critical friend to the system that may have caused fracture or damage.

When I started writing this blog, I said it was about the struggles of being a Christian in a messy world. That is still very much the case, and I have so much to learn. Thankyou already to those who have prayed for me, and shared their insights and ideas. I have benefitted greatly from your support, and seek to follow Christ’s call to play my small part to bring healing and reconciliation in a divided and chaotic world.

Gracious God of justice and mercy, love and goodness, You must look at this world and weep at the greed, violence and corruption that tears us apart, and causes so much destruction. Lord Jesus, You came into this world, that through the cross, You bring an offer of forgiveness, healing and reconciliation to all. By your Holy Spirit, show us if there is something you want us to do, to bring acceptance, healing and moral repair to those whose lives have been marred by violence and trauma. As a society, may we let go of past prejudices, and toxicity, and instead embrace prayer and humility to gain a deeper understanding of our differences, so we can build a more just world. Amen.

A gentle rest.

I have the good fortune to be abroad, with opportunities to swim in the warm, azure waters. It feels like freedom to move through the waves, and to feel the vastness of the sky above, and the softness of the sandy ocean floor below.

And now and again I just float on the surface, gazing at the cloudless sky, and being rocked by the waves. I enter the water with a thousand concerns and worries, and cry out to God, asking for discord to end, and harmony to be restored. People seem to be fighting in every sphere, with so many hurt, confused, disillusioned and weary with it all.

When I am buoyant in the water, gazing at the flurry clouds languidly dallying across the sky, it is a moment of being gently rocked by the movement of the waves. It feels immensely peaceful. I let go of my worries and anxieties, and just be. Especially in these moments, God feels very near. I remember the verse from Isaiah 30;15

‘ in rest and returning you will be saved, in quietness and trust you will find strength.’

In these days of acrimony, we try to discern what is best, we pray for insight and wisdom, we become exhausted trying to work out our views on many divisive issues. We need to use our brains, to ponder, to pray. But there are also moments, when I think Jesus just calls us to come spend time in His presence, just to be in His love, and to receive from Him. These times are precious and healing, reconnecting us deeply with the love of Jesus Christ.

Jesus said to his disciples ‘ Come to me all you who are weary and heavy burdened, for I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls’ Matthew 11: 28-29

There are seasons, when we feel deeply the weight of a world polarised and divided, and we are bewildered and weary. Especially at these times, Jesus is gentle and patient with us, calling us to rest in His arms. Here, may we find the restoration and peace we seek.

Mighty and gracious God, we know of Your truth and mercy, Your beauty and goodness, and we trust that we can come to You as your beloved children. We acknowledge that we often try hard, but we make mistakes and can get disorientated in the plethora of strident voices and shouting. Lord Jesus, when we are confused and exhausted, may we always return to your presence, to rest in Your arms, to be cradled in your gentle acceptance and grace. Holy Spirit, at some point You will lead us back into the complexities of the modern, hurting world. Yet just for this time, may we enter into Your gentle rest, and find nurture and renewal in your Holy presence, Amen.

The swallows are leaving……

Over the summer I have loved watching the swallows and swifts darting and then soaring over the water, and hiding in the eaves. They are so dainty and energetic and joyful to watch.

It is very still around the loch, when these gorgeous birds migrate south. I have a yearning for their company, but know that being thankful for the memory of them is enough. I always find it astounding that such little birds fly south to Africa over the winter, sometimes flying 200 miles a day. They show such strength and perseverance, and seem to have an innate compass within.

The leaving of the swallows are a symbol of the end of summer, of a farewell to one season, and an invitation to embrace the new. Autumn might be a softer more mellow season, but it is equally beautiful. We are not to fear change, but to be prepared to move on, and to look for new possibilities in the landscape beyond.

The swallow, for me, symbolises that a fragile and diminutive being, can travel long distances, that seem way beyond their capacity. So God can use us, even when we feel fallible and inadequate, for His good and loving purposes. The secret is having the courage to set out, and then the wind of the Holy spirit guides us and carries us forward.

In Isaiah 40: verse 31 it says; ‘ those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles……..’ Whatever our circumstances, may we continue to place our hope in God, and find a strength in Him that carries us through.

Gracious God, Creator of all things, we thankyou for the birds of the air and the fish in the sea, for the incredible stories of animals in their habitats, and the rhythms of the earth. May we be attentive to the earth, be willing to protect it, and to learn from your creation. Thankyou for the way You speak to us through birds- swallows, sparrows and eagles -giving us courage to transition from one season to another, to know that You see us, and value us, and lead us in new directions. Lord Jesus Christ, as you called the disciples, reveal more of your purpose for us. Holy Spirit grant us perseverance, renew our trust, and equip us to explore new territory, in Jesus’ name, Amen.

Prayers so needed!

Sitting in a coffee shop watching people on the morning communte. Often their heads are down, they look tired and as if they have the weight of the world on their shoulders. Listening to people, they are speaking of targets and cutbacks and pressure. It feels as if we have become aworld where statistics matter more than people. Instead of providing services that support people, companies are trying to get as much profit from each individual transaction, however that is obtained.

On the international scene too, we seem to have lost the plot. Backroom arms deals and the pursuit of perception of status and power dominate, instead of paying attention to the cry of the marginalised and the vulnerable. There are so many terrible situations of conflict, originating in visions of delusional schemes for self aggrandisement and power, and that are completely unnecessary. The concept of the dignity and worth of each individual, and the concept of justice have been jettisoned.

I think of Jesus, looking at Jerusalem, and weeping, and in one moment saying ‘Jerusalem, Jerusalem, how I have longed to gather your children together, as a child gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing’. Matthew 23:37 Jesus wants healing and peace for the people, but they are rebellious and obstinate and will not listen.

Maybe we need to pause, and questioning what we are doing as individuals. Are we conforming to a world where greed and self interest rule? Or will we follow the teaching of Jesus, where we choose mercy over judgement, purity of heart over money and status ? Every time we choose to honour people’s dignity and humanity, we are rebel against much of the culture of our age.

You might say, well the church and other Christian organisations do not have a good history in this area. That is true. All denominations have fallen short, and we need to admit that, to timeously address what is wrong and make amends where that is possible. Acknowledging fault in the past, should strengthen our desire now to refocus on following Jesus’ teaching, to be wise, to work for justice and to love without measure, whatever our situation.

Karl Barth once said ‘to clasp the hands in prayer is the beginning of an uprising against the disorder of the world.’ May we persevere in prayer, for the kingdom of God to come, where wellbeing and peace are valued more than strife and war. May we catch a glimpse of the power of prayer to bring change, and ask the holy spirit to help us to pray without ceasing.

Lord Jesus, You saw the suffering and devastation of the people in Jerusalem. You were moved with compassion and you wept. May we wake up to all that is wrong with human nature, the greed, pride, the hypocrisy and corruption, and to weep at the suffering here and in the wider world. If we are honest, we acknowledge that we too are guilty of putting our own needs before the needs of others. Lord Jesus forgive us. Teach us to pray and act for a better world, in our daily work and lives, and in our prayers for a just and healthy humanity on this planet. Holy Spirit, may this not be a passing whim, but a commitment to pray every day, for You can do beyond what we dare to dream, every time we intercede for others. May people of integrity and compassion bring change in our society, and may that change start with us, Amen.