Tag: guarding our hearts

Trying not to fix things……

Letting stuff go..

I have been travelling, and as usual my bag is too heavy with books- bulging at the seams. I end up with aching shoulders, wondering why I do this, and resolving never again to pack so much heavy stuff in my hand luggage. I need to learn to travel lighter.

Travelling lightly can have a deeper meaning too, as sometimes we get too emotionally weighed down. We get caught up in people’s stories, we take responsibility for things that are not ours, we try to shape things that are not ours to control. We can become exhausted, anticipating where problems might emerge, and trying to trouble shoot  before they happen. It can be wearying, and even worse counter productive.

Having good boundaries is part of the Christian life. Jesus called us to love others as we love ourselves. This means a balance between service and self care. We are to care for others, but not so that we become empty. We are to self care, but not in a way that becomes selfish and oblivious to the needs of others.

I have always loved the verse in Proverbs 4: 23 ‘Guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life’ This means that we are to take good care of our heart, so it doesn’t become bitter or hard. We are to trust God, and to do what we can, but then leave it with Him. Our temptation is to try to tell some one what to do, instead of supporting them listen to Gods voice for themselves, to try to fix that difficult situation, rather than to watch and pray but know it is not ours to interfere with. Things are often so much bigger than we recognise. We are not responsible for the decisions or actions of others. May God grant us the discernment we need.

Eternal Father, before Your face, generations come and go, and yet the patterns of human behaviour seem set. We often want to do the right thing, yet end up doing the wrong. Lord Jesus, please have mercy on us. Sometimes we see suffering and pain, and we are tempted to try and put it right in our own strength, to fix things. Yet by doing this, we can enable bad behaviours, and nothing is learnt. Holy Spirit, help us know when to speak and when to be silent, when to get involved, and when to let things go. Help us not to be weighed down by things that are not ours. Help us truly guard our hearts, and grant us a healthy balance in life, in Jesus’ name, Amen. 

Guarding our hearts.

Keeping them tender

There is so much which feels overwhelming. The effects of the pandemic continue on, the winter is round the corner, the health services seem over stretched and under resourced.

In the midst of this, if you are sitting with chronic illness, living with trauma, or grieving, there is another dimension to things, with feelings of frustration, helplessness and isolation. We can be bewildered, tired and hurting, and so we we protect ourselves by putting up barriers to prevent further pain or heartache.

The problem with this is, that the solution becomes worse than the initial issue. We end up becoming numb, locked inside ourselves, unwilling to venture out, and reluctant to trust. It might keep us safe in the short term, but longer term it actually imprison us.

So what do we do? If we are in a caring profession, how can we keep loving, even when we are close to burn out? If we are in difficult relationships, how do we care for people, who we do not easily relate to?

I wish I had the answer. A verse that is an anchor however is from Proverbs 4 verse 23:

‘Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.’

We need to know that our heart, our emotional wellbeing is precious. Sometimes if we have experienced loss or hurt, whether that is in relationship breakdown or death, we get lost in a maze of feelings of questioning, an emotional paralysis and deep ache that oscillate in intensity and can incapacitate us. Our hearts seem broken, and no longer able to function.

I believe that God heals the broken hearted, but it can be quite a long, turbulent process. At times we seem in danger of getting stuck. It is so hard to be patient, and to trust. Sometimes we need time out, to be able to find the support we need to recover, and to know that this is ok.

So we seek to guard our hearts, to make decisions not to over extend what we are trying to do. We need to ask God to keep us from temptation, to slow us down and to give us wisdom, to show us how to live. And I think living a life of prayer is key, for if we know how much we are loved by God, then that loving relationship breathes new life into us each morning, and gives us courage to love that the day ahead. And that is all we need.

Gracious God, some days we feel empty, rejected or alone. The temptation is to bury our feelings deep down just in order to survive. Forgive us. In Ezekiel chapter 36 You say You will take away our heart of stone, and give us a heart of flesh. Lord Jesus, may Your heart beat in ours, and give us courage to feel and to care. Holy spirit, keep us from temptation, and help us live so closely to Jesus, that we have tender hearts, able to love and be loved. Please fill us with your love every day, and this might somehow then spill over into the lives of others, Amen.