Advent tears.

Advent- a time of preparation- not just preparing for Christmas, but for the coming of Jesus Christ, the baby of Bethlehem, the Saviour of the world. It can be a time of people coming together, of food preparation, of carol services and prayer. We enjoy Christmas hymns in candle light, nativity services and the Word being proclaimed. Worship is sacred and meaningful.

Something I have noticed however, is that sometimes in worship we are told to be joyful. I understand that joy is a gift from God, and that there is so much to give thanks for. However people can be going through difficult days, when joy can be elusive. People can have health concerns, be experiencing family heartbreak, or the recent loss of a loved one. It can feel that everyone else is doing ok, but that you are not.

It seems so important to give people space to be real. Christmas can be a poignant time, with people travelling long journeys, under pressure to buy things they can’t afford, isolated from loved ones, remembering those no longer here, haunted by memories from the past.

We often sanitise the Christmas story, remembering only angels, shepherds and wise men. We forget the incredulity of Joseph, the stress for Mary, that long uncomfortable journey to Bethelehem, and the uncertainty of what was going to happen next. Having a baby round the back of the inn must have been a frightening experience for a young girl. Placing a new born baby in a manger, gives a small insight as to the impracticalities of the whole thing -the Messiah, being born on earth in the most humble and unlikely of circumstances.

In Matthew’s gospel, chapter 1 verse 22 it says ‘all this took place to fulfil what the Lord said through the prophet ‘ the virgin shall be with child, and will give birth to a Son, and they will call him Emmanuel, which means ‘God with us.’

We are so thankful for the presence of Jesus with us in all circumstances. As we come nearer to Christmas, we may well feel joy that we can celebrate Christ’s coming. But for those whose hearts are heavy through pain, worry or grief, may we acknowledge this, and sit with them without pressure or expectation. And may each person know that their story is known by God, that they are seen and not forgotten, and that they are treasured and loved.

Eternal God, You are our Creator, and we are so thankful at our Saviour coming to earth in the form of a human baby, vulnerable and small. Lord Jesus we are thankful that you are our Emmanuel, the God who is with us. We marvel at your grace to us, when we so little deserve it. We want to worship You, and to celebrate your birth. Sometimes however, our hearts are sore, and we worship through our tears. In our communities, help us to accept each other, in the same way that You welcome us, just as we are. Holy spirit, whatever our circumstances this Christmas, may our lives be touched by You, and may we experience, comfort, love and hope. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Swallows and vibrant colours all around….

There has been so much sunshine in May, so far. There are more people smiling, children out playing, people going to the seaside. It has been so lovely. I have seen beautiful blossom, deep green foliage emerging, and even swallows, although they swooped and dived too quickly for me to photograph!

In the midst of the struggles of life, it is good to take a moment, just to notice. Sometimes our cares and worries so overwhelm us, that we have our heads down. I think God calls us gently to lift our heads up, to open our eyes, and to enjoy the beauty of His creation with thankful hearts.

There is an old hymn ‘For the beauty of the earth’ and it contains the words:

‘ For the beauty of the earth, for the beauty of the skies, for the love which from our birth, over and around us lies, Christ, our God, to Thee we raise this our sacrifice of praise.’

On these gorgeous days of blue skies and sunshine, we feel a deep thanksgiving for the beauty around us, but also the gift of health and relationship and stillness. It fills our heart with praise, and gives us a renewed awareness of all that is good. Perhaps we are weary, or have become jaundiced or our hearts are sore. Just taking time to be still, and to pause and to notice the loveliness all around can refresh our souls. May we find that renewal in this season.

Gracious and Eternal God, in these days of sunshine and shade, we remember the Words of psalm 46 ‘to be still and know that You are God’. Around us we see bluebells and yellow broom, azure skies and vibrant blossom. We take time to notice, and to give thanks. Lord Jesus inspire us, to pause, to sink into the landscape, and to find much joy. Holy Spirit, heal what is broken and jaded within us, and may there always be a song of praise on our lips. May the sunshine warm our hearts, and deepen our reverence for all your abundant gifts, Amen

A seal at the beach!

I was swimming in the sea today- so wonderful and almost warm. And in the water was a seal- he was about 50 metres away, but round the beach the cry went up’ there’s a seal!!!’ and everyone was so excited, not just the small children. It was like we had never seen one before. ( I didn’t get a picture, as it was a bit wet).

Seals are amazing creatures- they have such a rounded head, and move so gracefully in the water. What I notice about them is their desire to play! On so many occasions at Millport in the past, they have followed me along the beach, almost playing peekaboo, every time I turned round to look at them. They are comical in their interactions.

This reminds me of the importance of play. Play between adults and children, can help children feel safe, help them to voice how they are feeling, and strengthen relationships. I came across ‘ Theraplay’ and just love how simple it is and how effective. It is about creating positive relationships in fun ways. It sounds simple, but is really profound, and can bring healing to children who are struggling or unsettled.

After all these years of trauma and pandemic, it feels like we need to learn to play again. The sunshine helps, and whether it is making sandcastles or paddling in the sea, moments when we are absorbed in fun things, are so relaxing and healing. Tensions leave us, and we laugh again.

It is amazing that Jesus Himself, in the midst of his ministry, made time to be with children, and surely to play. There is an innocence and pure joy in children, that reminds us all that play is indeed essential for our wellbeing. We need more playing!

Gracious Father God, You take delight in your children, and love to see us enjoying Your Creation. Thankyou for days of sunshine, and animals and birds and fish that bring us joy. Lord Jesus you remind us that even when there is so much going on in life, playing is a blessing, sharing fun and laughter, and building relationships. Please forgive us for times when we are so serious, and heavy in heart, that it seems as if we shoulder the cares of the world. Holy spirit, we commit the people and places that we worry about, to Jesus in prayer. And we give thanks for lighter joyful moments, when we can play and laugh, and find the deep healing we need, Amen

A legacy of wonder- the ice cubes are dancing!

We have had a beautiful weekend- my amazing son Andrew has become 21 years old. For a mum, you wonder where all the years went- they pass so quickly in a whirl.

It has been a very emotional time. We are so sad that Colin – Andrew’s dad isn’t here to celebrate with us, nor Colin’s parents. So much loss, and a big gaping hole in our lives. Having tried to write a little about Colin’s life too, my soul is full of the things that went wrong, times of illness and irritation.

However I also wrote some personal notes about Andrew’s life as he grew up, just now and again, to remember some of the details of his childhood. And at the weekend, I reread these, and it has been so healing. It reminded me of Andrew’s courage, his complete independence as a small boy, his determination, his quirky sense of humour, his insights, his patience. Andrew has an amazing turn of phrase- like when he was small, and he looked at his orange juice one hot day, and said ‘ the ice cubes are dancing’ Once you hear this, ice cubes are never the same again, they move and clink and dance to an unheard beat. It is seeing the wonder in the ordinary.

And so, even as I look back over the years, and grieve the losses and pain of my husband’s disability, so I have been reminded of the moments of mercy and wonder in every day. I am so privileged to have a son, who has always done his own thing, and who has brought us such joy. Whether it is his love of cars and their engines, or his insights into science fiction, or his infectious enjoyment of waterfights, our lives were always full.

And I think of Jesus saying of his sheep in John chapter 10 verse 10a: ‘I have come that they might have life, and gave it to the full.’ Jesus gives us the gift of life, with its sorrows and splashes of light, to experience the sadneses of life, and moments of connection and inspiration that are so ethereal it makes you cry.

And so today, I am full of a deep gratitude, for the vivid reminder that in the midst of uncertainty and illness, God blessed us as a family with a beautiful life together- however uproarious and chaotic it looked! And Colin’s legacy lives on in Andrew’s hard work, strength, loyalty, insight and humour.

May we value our children, and all our loved ones, and tell them what they mean to us, and savour every moment we have with them. May we always pray and encourage them, so that a legacy of wonder and love, can be passed down. Let us pray

Dear God, Creator of all things, You share with us all that You are, love, mercy, goodness and truth, forgiveness, wonder and joy- as Jesus demonstrates, life in all its fullness. Life can be bittersweet, but may your holy spirit keep our hearts from becoming hard, and enable us always to see the wonder around us, and to share that dance and legacy of love with others, Amen.

Joy in the journey

Dear friends, we are all on a journey from one place to another. For some of us, as lockdown restrictions ease, we have physically travelled. For all of us, we know that we are on a spiritual journey through life, taking us from experiences in the past into whatever lies ahead. There are many stony paths, diversions, hill tops and even dead ends, sometimes we are injured enough route, and we need so much guidance as we travel.

One of the wonderful things about God, is that He has promised to be with us. We want to learn from the past, to rejoice in the good, to learn from our mistakes, to find healing for the saddnesses, so we can continue on our journey. Often we reach a crossroads on the path, and have to work out our next step.

The famous words in Proverbs chapter 3, verses 5 and 6 say:

‘ Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.’

Taking time to listen to God, to pray, to study His Word, to take time to reflect, so we can discerm the way ahead is so vital. And it is only knowing where we have come from, that helps us work out our next steps. Being more open and honest about my life in the past has been exhausting and scary, but hopefully eventually it might be liberating. The Holy Spirit sometimes takes us through the wilderness ( not our first choice of location!) yet the things we learn – our complete dependence on God for all things- couldn’t be experienced any other way.

In a conversation recently, some one said that they were ‘ plodding’ and sometimes there is a heaviness to our lives, we are just putting one foot in front of another.

A song from Michael Card encourages me, and it has the following lyrics: ‘ There is a joy on the journey, There’s a light we can love on the way. There is a wonder and wildness to life, And freedom for those who obey.’

Sometimes the jouney is uphill, and we are breathless and our muscles are sore. Sometimes we have to stop and rest for a while. Sometimes we have to check our compass, and go a different route. But with our Saviour with us, there is light and wonder and wildness on that journey, and paradoxically freedom from obedience. And a joy, even in the hardest of places.

Whether we are in a dark marsh, a rain soaked walk, or a mountaintop, may we somehow find joy on our journey, a thanksgiving for the process, and hope that our destination might bring better things.

Let us pray, Dear God, your people often set out on journeys, Abraham and Sarah, Moses, David and so many others. We too are travelling through life, and sometimes the road is clear, but other times we are disorientated and in the dark. Be our Guide, Lord Jesus, and may we have courage to follow your Voice. May your Holy spirit help us find that freedom in obedience, that brings us thanksgiving and joy, Amen.